Karingu | The Culling

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Karingu | The CullingMay 25, 2021 22:18:34 GMT -5
Necro
All of the disadvantages in this world stems from a person's lack of ability.
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Karingu
no one escapes death



RELIGION'S DEITY: Enenra

TEMPLE LOCATION: Frost Country

VILLAGE LOYALTY: --



RELIGION IDEOLOGY


Karingu isn't a religion for the light of heart, nor is it a religion that is commonly practiced. Seen more as a cult rather than a religion, this doesn't stop followers from appeasing a rather mysterious and violent god. One that can only be detailed in text, not even mediums can detail this entity. To follow this religion is simple, sacrifice individuals in order to awaken the god Enenra so it may rise up to be the one true god. By doing the what Enenra asks each follower absolves themselves of their sins with each concurrent sacrifice absolving the sins of a family to those the follower cares about. To protect their souls from finding their way against Enenra's wrath.



RELIGION LAWS



  1. One shall not feel remorse for the sacrifice.
  2. One shall hunt down their prey solely with Enenra's gifts and adept skill.
  3. One must offer a sacrifice at least twice a month. A prayer must be given to Enenra once per seven days.
  4. One must give their entire being to Enenra.
  5. One must spread Enenra's calling by showcasing the power of Enenra.
  6. All monuments erected and all shrines built must have some foundation from the cadavers of those sacrificed.
  7. Enenra's name is never to be spoken, refer to your god as 'The Old One'.



RELIGION STRUCTURE


While there is no hard order or structure of the Karingu faith, there is still a totem pole of followers.

The Alpha and The Omega:
Simply put, nothing is above Enenra and Enenra is ever-present. In every light particle, in every shadow, in all life and in all things inanimate, Enenra exists. Sleeping until fully awoken by the sacrifices from the called.


The Outsiders:
Shadow figures handpicked by Enenra itself before its slumber, these figures take the souls of the sacrificed to Enenra to be consumed.


Void Walkers:
'The Called', 'Agent of Chaos', 'Void Walkers', many names are given to those that answer Enenra's calling but the true official name is Void Walkers. Void Walkers are the loyal followers who are given gifts from Enenra to carry out their sacrifices. While the bottom of the pole, they are the most valuable assets of the Karingu faith.



RELIGION HISTORY


It is said, written that Enenra existed before all creation. That the god existed before time-space was even formulated. Before the first planet, existing in a vacuum of darkness. It wasn't until the formation of stars awoken the deity, setting out to consume all things that threatened the dark peace that it resided in. As more planets and more stars were formed, life began and Enenra was pissed. Planet to planet, star to star, galaxy to galaxy, Enenra assembled an army to help combat the forces of light and life.

All of the chosen were visited in their dreams by Enenra itself before the conception of The Outsiders. All were beckoned to bloodlust, madness, awakened to a new calling. This was dubbed The Culling, Karingu, ages upon ages, eons to eons, Enenra reaped billions, trillions of souls sacrificed by its followers; in turn, Enenra gave them unholy powers fit for their atrocious acts.

It was said at the peak of Enenra's rule that followers were given powers even greater than the Bijuu. But, at the peak of its power, Enenra saw its followers quickly and exponentially leaving the faith, slowly forgetting Enenra, condemning it to be a false god, citing these atrocious acts are a cover-up for a heinous plot; pining its followers with labels such as terrorists. Out of desperation, Enenra created The Outsiders to reach as many people to add to Karingu, going as far as imbuing The Outsiders with the last of its powers to give to potential followers.

Enenra went into a deep slumber, saving the last bit of energy to exist. the Outsider, acting on Enenra's will now go to the chosen to ascend into something greater, to become the saviors of Enenra. Painted as hoy warriors resurrecting a pure, selfless god, The Outsiders now trick the Void Walkers, slowly corrupting them until they are ready to accept the truth and carry out Enenra's will. Sacrificing as much as they can to resurrect their Old God so it may realize its divine journey and repay the Void Walkers with world-destroying abilities, to cleanse the cosmos of other weak deities.



RELIGION ABILITIES


Enenra desires the quickest sacrifices but currently cannot grant a gift from itself. Instead, one gift is granted by whichever Outsider imbued with Enenra's power recruits the follower.

Gift of Totan:
Enenra allows Totan to grant the prowess of a true hunter. Granting them the ability to silently stalk and move against a target. This grants the user undeniable stealth that is a hard counter to the elite shinobi, Silent Killing.


Curse of Oda:
When granted by Oda, Enenra's power increases the individuals smelling and hearing abilities to be on par with an Elite Jōnin's passive sensory limit. Due to this cap, this ability suffers and benefits as that range is both active and passive capabilities.


Will of Shingen:
When Shingen recruits a Void Walker, he grants the individual the ability to withstand even the most severe pain without a wince. While the pain tolerance is demonically high, it should be of considerable note that the pain is very real. While the individual cannot feel the pain of a stab wound through their chest, that doesn't protect them from blood loss, shock, or other impeccable losses.


Wake of Zetsubo:
Zetsubo sees this gift from Enenra as a way to indirectly sew chaos. Increasing the physical prowess of those encountered by Zetsubo, an individual will see taijutsu ability increase by one tier level above their own. Allowing non-specs to power through like secondaries. Secondaries to Primaries, and them to soles. Sole Taijutsu specs receive a special gift to be comparable to a Tai secondary in the rank above their own due to the skill that comes with the strength and speed boost.



RELIGION MEMBERS

  • Alpha and Omega - Enenra (God)(NPC)
  • Outsider - Oda (NPC)
  • Outsider - Shingen (NPC)
  • Outsider - Zetsubo (NPC)
  • Outsider - Totan (NPC)
  • Void Walker - Name Here
  • Void Walker - Name Here
  • Void Walker - Name Here
  • Void Walker - Name Here
  • Void Walker - Name Here
  • Void Walker - Name Here
  • Void Walker - Name Here
  • Void Walker - Name Here
  • Void Walker - Name Here
  • Void Walker - Name Here
last edit by Necro on Jun 11, 2021 20:02:06 GMT -5
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Karingu | The CullingMay 30, 2021 22:16:13 GMT -5
Wynne
Nindo Goes Here: Edit Profile > Personal > Most Recent Status
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Hello Necro, I'll be the one looking over your religion today. There is a lot that needs to be said, so please read carefully. 


Religion Ideology:

- I believe when you say seen more as an occult, you mean more as a cult. Put a sentence or two about why Karingu has followers. What is Enenra offering his followers? Seems weird that people are just randomly following a god and sacrificing people for it for no reason. Are they doing it for a better future, the power he gives, or something else? Gods also don't consume each other for power, so that part doesn't really make sense.


Religion Laws:

- Law II: "One shall hunt down their prey solely with Enenra's gifts" seems fine to me but I don't understand the inept skill part. How else would they hunt their prey other than using their own skill? I'd say remove the inept skill part since it doesn't seem necessary. Or change it to something like One shall hunt down their prey using Enenra's gifts.
- Law III: What does this sacrifice entail? Is it a human sacrifice or will any corpse do?
- Law V: I'd say merge this with Law IV since they are both so similar. So something like One must give their entire being to Enenra and follow his calling. Or just take out the follow his calling part since its implied.
- Law VI: While the part about receiving more gifts from Enenra is fine and all, its not a law. Either take this out or put it in the ideology section.
- Law VII: Add One must at the beginning. You had a whole theme going for the previous five laws, seems weird to stop it now.
- Law VIII: Clarify what you mean. What do you mean foundation? Are you talking about pieces of those sacrificed or something of theirs that was precious?
- Law IX: Merge this with Law III so for that law put something like One must sacrifice using a ritual offering at least twice a month.


Religion Structure:

- Take out "Without Void Walkers, Enenra will die". Enenra is a god, and does not need people worshipping him to live. Worshipping him helps with his powers, not his lifeforce. Its also kind of barebones as well. Are there really only the Outsiders and the Voidwalkers? What about the casual worshippers that don't get powers? 


Religion History:


- Enenra did not exist before creation. Gods appeared after Bijuus appeared, not before. I'd say take out the whole first paragraph. I don't know what type of being you are making out Enenra to be, but from your description it definitely isn't a god. Gods are not as strong as you are making them out to be, and nowhere in your ideology or laws does it state Enenra goes against the forces of light and life. What even constitutes as the force of light?

- Reaping trillions of souls isn't going to work. That number is way too high. Right now Earth has about 7.8 billion people alive on it right now. From that you can see just how unbelievable what you just stated was. Not only that, you're telling me no one noticed that many people being sacrificed? I find that highly unlikely. Put a sentence or two about how they avoided being found out or how they dealt with people trying to stop them.

- "It was said at the peak of Enenra's rule that followers were given powers even greater than the Bijuu." No to this. Absolutely not. I don't even know where to begin with this, just take it out. The rest of this paragraph doesn't really work with what you stated previously either. Enenra was so powerful he reaped trillions of souls and then his followers just up and left? Why? They already killed and sacrificed people for him. They just get bored or something? Not only that if they were getting powers as well, leaving him makes no sense. I need you to elaborate. Take out the whole world destroying abilities and cleanse the cosmos part as well. Your statements are too broad in scope. This is a normal god, not the ultimate being you are making him out to be.


Religion Abilities:

- First off, you made this section way too powerful and I believe we both know this. Religions are supposed to give a boon or two. Not as many as FOUR. The only reason you would even have more than one is if a couple abilities fit together thematically. And even then, they would be weaker than if you had just one ability. You need to pick a defining gift or a theme for your religion, not putting a bunch of random options for people to pick through. The whole sole Tai strength and speed is completely unacceptable. Sensing chakra and the other sensory improvements have nothing to do with strength or speed either. The abilities must relate with each other. And don't put eight abilities, that is way too many. You're just putting a bunch of powerful abilities that don't correlate with each other.

- You state the Void Walkers are basically hunters for Enenra, so their abilities they receive should relate to this. So something like having enhanced senses would work as it is used to find the sacrifices for Enenra. I don't want to see something like Enhanced Smell then Enhanced Strength, and then something like Fear Aura. Don't do that.

- I'd also be more specific about the roles of the Void Walkers as this will help in deciding their abilities. You're pretty vague on that part which is why you might be having trouble keeping a theme. If you want differing abilities, create different roles. You can look at other examples in the approved religion.

- This part I'm about to say might seem a little harsh, but it needs to be said. I play Dead by Daylight, so I know exactly where you got these skills from. And because of that, I can be absolutely certain barely any effort was put into some of these abilities. Play With Your Food, The Thrill Of The Hunt, and Unnerving Presence for instance. Not only are these basically the same as the abilities from the game, but you didn't even try to make it fit Fallen Blades lore. Hiding in the shadows and then striking at great speeds against someone? That works in DBD with Michael Myers not in Fallen Blades. Lets move on to The Thrill Of The Hunt. This also doesn't even work in FB. You stalk your opponent and you get a higher Tai spec? No. Once against its too much DBD and not enough Fallen Blades. Finally Unnerving Presence. This is the worst of the bunch and I'm actually offended you even put this in here. "Causing fear in all targets within a 42-meter radius." What was your plan here? Void Walkers can just instantly make people fear them all the way up 138 feet away? The perk before that was literally about being stealthy and now this?

- There's more that I could say but I think I've given you enough to look over. Scrap all the abilities and make new ones using what I told you and follow all of the instructions listed above. 
Wynne has written 164 posts
Karingu | The CullingMay 31, 2021 2:12:21 GMT -5
Necro
All of the disadvantages in this world stems from a person's lack of ability.
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Ideology has been expanded on to address why followers would have faith in this religion, a reasoning that goes more in depth already in contrast to what has been approved. [1], [2], [3]

Regardless of making sense, the previously referenced Kimyōna Shinsei religion seeks out the death of all Gods, Bijū, and all who stand against them. For what purpose, and why the death of all? And who would follow a faith that makes followers appear as villains with no true aim besides carrying a will. Something as extravagant and as wild as this makes the Karingu religion look tame and has a purpose. As pointed above earlier, the death of everything seems even weirder than a god consuming others; not for power, but for the title of being the one true religion, Enenra being the one true deity, makes eons more sense than the death of everything.




Second law, inept converted to adept as the word definitions were confused.
Third law would pertain to a human sacrifice as implied in ideology, history, and abilities.
Laws 5 & 6 removed.
Added One must to the requested law.
Law revised and merged with 3.




Highlighted sentence removed. As barebones as believed, excluding the god, Yajū no futan has an extraordinarily similar structure to how Karingu is currently set up. With this religion, followers either go all in and become a Void Walker or they don't interact with it, there is no in between. In this history, the religion goes in-depth what The Outsiders do, and that essentially eliminates the grey area.




Religions get the chance to be more fictitious stories rather than absolute truths, as highlighted in Religion System overview:
While next to no one knows the truth about these beings, such information is irrelevant. The only fact that matters in the present is that these entities, these gods are capable of giving very powerful gifts to their followers, but as always; such gifts come at a price and while these prices range when it comes to codes of conduct two prices are constant: A follower may not use forbidden techniques (such as ninjutsu, genjutsu or standard fuuinjutsu.) and the follower must offer up part of their own chakra to these deities when required.

This allows religions to really reach and there has already been an approved religion whose story spans beyond the creation of the Bijū, theTaiyō Teikei faith exists as with the sun. The sun has been around a lot longer than any Bijū.

Both the above points allow Enenra to have reaped trillions of souls, why? This allows the tale that Enenra has existed long and thus has been to many planets. While this does not excuse freakish aliens like the Otsutsuki clan, it does imply life other than where we RP exist. As there are not many advancements in astrology with our universe, this allows an untapped origin point that no RP-able character can achieve but is possible for a god, whose powers easily surpasses anything else on site.

"citing these atrocious acts are a cover-up for a heinous plot; pining its followers with labels such as terrorists." This part was added in an attempt to help explain why people would start leaving the religion, being called terrorists for supernatural powers, following social ideals, this is a big sign to jump ship.

The last expanse goes back to the extreme fabrication of the faith. While gods can become stronger, with the history point of its power weakening it to a slumber, it's literally impossible for a single planet to produce enough sacrifices to give a god quantum-warping abilities. The last part is for flavor and doesn't harm anyone if it's left in there.




Abilities are revised a great deal. That's literally all that can be said as your last point voids all rebuttals and voids your points by saying delete and remake. I will say that each remake is designed to assist the user keep on par/combat shinobi as they cannot use any jutsu that is even described as chakra while using Tai or Bukijutsu. Due to that ruling change, that severely adversely affects Religion users as some verbiage mistake undermines a whole system.
last edit by Necro on May 31, 2021 2:17:43 GMT -5
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Karingu | The CullingJun 11, 2021 9:21:49 GMT -5
Wynne
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Religion Ideology:

- While the Kimyona Shinsei religion seeks out the death of all Gods, Bijū, and all who stand against them, they don't randomly sacrifice people for their god and neither do they want the death of all, only those that stand against them. I wouldn't call this religion wild or extravagant because their reasoning makes sense according to their beliefs. Kimyona Shinsei followers have a passion for their god which is why they follow it and do the things they do. There is a reason for their ideals. 

- Take out the part where Enenra consumes other gods as gods do not work like that.


Religion Laws:

- Law V: You have a typo at the beginning. On instead of One. 
- Law VIII: Please add a period at the end. 


Religion History:

- Religions do get some leeway, however in this case you went too far with it. And while the Taiyo Teikei faith does gave a story that spans upon the creation of Bijuu, it is something simple. Like being a bright light on sunny days, not a god attempting to consume all of creation. Hikari was not known about until the Bijuu came to be, and he did not give his blessings until the Bijuu were out and about.

- I can kind of see where you're trying to go with all of this, but it's going to have to be a no on my part. Keep all the info and related stuff to the planet Fallen Blades is on. A god's power should not easily surpass anything else on this site, as Bijuu are stronger as stated in the rules. Basically just majorly tone down everything you have and keep it on the scale of other religions.

- Make the changes in your history that I stated in my previous post, the things I listed for you to change was not a request.


Religion Abilities:

- Gift of Totan: Undeniable stealth is a no go. The silent stalking part is fine so put something like with they can move around quietly around with barely a sound. So while they are pretty stealthy, they are not infallible. Also the counter to Silent Killing doesn't really make sense. This ability allows them to move around quietly, so I can't see how this counters someone being able to kill silently. 

- Will of Shingen: "Note that the pain is very real." Do you mean to say wounds in this part?

- Wake of Zetsubo: Please fix the typos here
Wynne has written 164 posts
Karingu | The CullingJun 13, 2021 10:19:15 GMT -5
Mimoto Ekō
Leave me alone, damnit!
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You can take this outta notify, I'll need to rewrite most, if, not all the history and finish the edits I started but never finished, it'll be a while and I don't want to take up your time and clog notify. Cause I'm trying to brainstorm ideas while staying true to the core. If you want, I can ping you when I get it back up, but fr the sake of the line, I'd prefer newer/new people getting going. I apologize for my slowness responding as well, I'm going through stuff bogging down my motivation. Sorry I took so much of your time.
Necronomicon_Nightmare has written 69 posts